child dressing different

edited April 2012 in Parenting
If your child wanted to dress like the opposite sex would you let them? If so, at what age would you allow it?
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Comments

  • I would allow and support them to be who ever they wanted to be, at any stage of life.
  • When they were old enough to understand that criticism that comes with it.
  • I think criticism is for the week minded, and I would stand up for my child when they didn't have a voice.
  • @mimii36 I didn't mean to imply you would stand up for them...I was just adding a side note.
  • She can dress however she wants once she's able to afford her own clothes.
  • I think its important to allow a child to dress how they feel. Of course i buy all of their clotges so there r no suprises. I have to also not that i only have girls tho. Im not sure how it would go if i had a boy wanting to dress like a girl? I personally would maybe let him but i know my husband would most likely have a problem w it.
  • As a middle schooler I started wearing guy clothes mainly bc I skated and I hated pink. I also was always a tomboy and fat lol. SO guy clothes were baggy and hid my fatness. I always hung with the guys and I wasn't trying to be a guy just felt more comfortable in them. So that being said I'd let my daughter dress in boy clothes bc she is like me...she is into more boy things. Still a princess but a tomboy princess. Plays softball, rides on her scooter, has bumps , bruises and cuts from falling off the scooter. No dolls or Barbie for her. Now my son I'm not sure about, I have a ton of gay friends and have no problem at all with gay people but my son in a dress...I don't think I'd like it but I love him unconditionally so I'd support him.
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  • I agree with @Tootie08. When they buy their clothes, they can dress however they wish! :)
  • edited April 2012
    I also agree w @tootie08
  • @sehra4177 I agree with you. It really all depends on how far they go with it. Color wise it wouldn't matter or the fact of how baggy the clothes are. :)
  • I agree with @Tootie08 just like @Captivated. As long as I'm funding the clothes I'm picking them out. My 7 year old hates pinks, purples, reds and yelows of any shade. Her favorite color is blue.. she hates skirts and hot shorts... I can respect all that. But, she's not getting boys converse shoes, And1 clothes and Jordan bball shorts. If she can find any of these items in the girl section.. ok we can work something out.

    Now Willow Smith (Will Smith's Daughter) cut her hair and looks like a boy.

    She would have to have a Great explanation for that move if I was her momma
  • I agree with anybody who said when they can buy their own and for me out my house depending on the situation. If I don't agree even if I don't buy it its not going to happen you must be fully independent to make independent decisions around here lol jkbs...just like if I had a girl and she was working and buying her own clothes she would not be allowed to come into or leave my house looking like a $2 h**! Ijs
  • I WOULD SUPORT MY SON
  • Personally, my boys will wear boy clothes and my girls will wear girl clothes. I was a tomboy growing up, I never wore boys clothes. But I never liked pink or dresses or skirts or bikinis or anything. But I always found simple clothes in the girls section. When they are grown and out of my house and purchasing their own clothes that's their business.
  • @YNVTish Exactly! :-D
  • @Hot2Cold87 Exactly there's a limit to what is exceptable and what is not. ;;) Well said!
  • @smcox I agree. My sister was a tomboy but still wore clothes meant for girls without being "too girly".

    If there was something seemingly unisex in the boys department that she saw, and REALLY wanted, maybe.
  • @smcox I'm with you. I dress much more girly these days, but in high school, I wore mostly jeans & t-shirts.
  • Maybe I'm a bit hippy, but if she wants to wear boy clothes, I don't really care. If she wants to cut her hair short, why not. I think that being allowed self expression is a crucial part of growing up and figuring out who you are.
  • The ones who say self-expression, would you think the same if your teenage girl wanted to wear belly shirts, stilettos and short skirts? Hehe. I am all about expression, but my house is not a democracy. If I find it inappropriate, it will not be worn. I don't think a girl wearing "boys" clothes is inappropriate per se. It would really depend on the clothes.
  • Agree^^^ I'm pretty conservative and my kids will dress the same! No booty shorts, no short skirts, no belly showing, no high heels, no cleavage. My sons butt will not be hanging out either.
  • @captivated that's a good question. I feel that girls that wear that kind of attire do so for attention. If my daughter wanted to dress like that then her and I would need to address the reason(s) why she felt she needed that kind of attention. If my son wanted to dress differently just to get attention then we would address that as well. Now if either of them came to me and said they felt more comfortable on boys or girls clothes bc that's who they were ( and they weren't doing it for anyone else but themselves) then I would be ok with it.
  • @tootie08. 100% with you.
  • I let my girls pick out their clothes. They're more into looking Punky Brewster-ish though. The other day my 6 year old had me buy some mismatched socks. Not one sock in the pack had a mate. "It's stylish, Mommy." My 4 year old wears Toy Story shoes and shirts. As for my son, if he likes tights and dresses, I'm ok with that at any age. I wouldn't tell him that its for girls. My nephew (3) gets his nails painted pink or red and wears his sisters dress up clothes and shoes all the time. He still loves helping his dad fix things, tractors, dinosaurs and acting manly. He's a brute. Dressing a certain way doesn't define who your child is. If other people judge them based on what they're wearing, well, shame on them.
  • For the ladies who say that your kids will wear what you say until they buy their own...I am assuming you will buy them what you consider gender appropriate clothes (plz correct me of I am wrong). If this is the case my question is why do you believe dresses are only for girls and Jeans and tshirts are only for boys? Why isn't it acceptable to you that your son want to wear a dress (or pink) and your daughter wear boots and jeans (or blue)?
  • @captivated good point. There's definitely a line between self expression for yourself and self expression for others (ie boys checking them out) I also understand that there will be a point where she will dress how she wants, regardless of my rules. I have to spend the years that I have some control trying to teach them to be independent, to an extent, from social stigma as well as my own beliefs. In short, I want to teach her how to think for herself.
  • @ashley_smashley, I agree with you. And @natashalynn and @fate.

    I am not a nazi when it comes to clothing. If it was a "boy in girls body" or vice versa,then we would have a talk about what was best. I won't refuse to let my children be who they are.
  • There comes a point when trying SO hard to prove that your a certain way (ie: extremely liberal about clothing) comes across as wrong. If it wasn't wrong in some way, no one would have to defend it so hard. No one questions a girl in a dress, no one questions a boy in jeans.
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