I understand that it wont make him stop, but maybe a talk could encourage better decisions. Such as using protection & not having sex in his parents house. That is totally disrespectful. He obviously needs a refresher course in safe sex.
The reality is...most boys start having sex in their teenage years....we can talk and explain all of the dangers of sex but come the end of the day they are going to do what they are going to do.....its sad but its true....so if he wants to do grown up things then he needs to be addressed as an grown up....I don't think anyone is being "nonchalant" about teenage sex its just the reality of the situation.....imo
@armymommy I didn't read all the comments but as a parent of a teenager I would want to know. Point blank period! And yes @ mimii36 he needs to get in trouble...rather it be they talk to him sternly, ground him, beat him....their need to be consequences for his behavior! And not saying that those things will automatically make him smarter when it comes to sexual acts but if no one says anything than you can almost guarantee it will happen again.
The parents do have the right to know whether he does what he wants or not. And I won't tolerate anybody having sex in my house if its not me or my nd.
I guess my main concern is the fact that he blew her off when she tried to talk to him. If he wont listen to her maybe he'll listen to his parents. He needs to listen to someone. In this day & age protection is a MUST. Some responses were rather nonchalant. People don't see what the big deal is & 16 is the age of consent, etc. I just don't think most would feel that way if it was there teenager. The responses are reflecting ages...
@pregoagainyay....I agree with the grown up things....if he wants to be a grown up than treat him as such! If he is embarrassed bc its coming from his parents than guess what he is not mature enough to be having sex, let alone unprotected sex that can lead to bigger consequences. Maybe pics of STD of the privates like genital warts or herpes will convince him to use protection.
At 31 I am not even trying to raise my 16 year old step son's baby! And unfortunately it is so common on my husbands side of the family that no one even blinked when my husband had his son at 18....the cycle needs to be broken. Yes teenagers are having sex but that doesn't mean it is right or that they are ready for the consequences. Hell I know alot of adults that aren't ready.
By no means am I saying its right....and not for nothing I've never said my age so I'm not sure how my response reflected my age but any who.....I think the longer they wait the better.....but in all reality not all wait....all we can do is educate them the best we can....come the end of the day they will do with it what they will.....we can only hope they take our advice and make the right choices.....
It sure in the hell ain't @valentinasmommy and if he thinks it is he would sure have to get out of my house. You can't depend on me for every little thing and then think you can do what you wanna do bc your grown. As a parent it is my job to provide for my child, parent my child.....but if he is too grown to listen than we have a huge problem.
@pregoagainYAY, that was a generalized statement. Not aimed @ you. Please don't take it personal. It just seems the more nonchalant answers were coming from people closer to the brothers age & that's not meant to disrespect anyone. I just feel that certain views will change with age. The parents can't educate him properly if they are in the dark.
@armymommy I think too it depends how you were parented! My parents didn't take no bs and it wasn't that they were rough or unbearable but we knew what they expected of us. And if we didn't follow their rules their were consequences. And yes I would be mortified if one of my siblings walked in on me, but that's the chance you take when your doing it at your parents house and would I be even more mortified if that sibling told my parents...yes. But I would get over it, and hopefully see when I got older that my siblings and parents were only trying to protect me in re long run. Bc I would think that conversation of mom, dad I got so and so pregnant. Or mom, dad my penis is itching and I have bumps will you take me to the doctors would be a lot more mortifying! Lol
@pregoagainYAY, good! I don't want a pregnant woman looking to fight me. Lol. @valentinasmommy, Exactly & that age will be once you're outta my doggone house! Lol
Not to be hateful to anyone when I say this. @amyduh first off just because its my parents house doesn't mean I can't open doors... he is 16 which is still a "teen" and I'm not sure if you have heard but teen pregnancy is out of control. But Its not all about pregnancy would u not worry about him getting an STd. So when you say I shouldn't do what I did, I completely disagree. I tried talking to him about and was ignored. Second just because everyone on here is pregnant doesn't mean its okay for a child to get pregnant. FYI I USED CONDOMS AND WAS ON BIRTH CONTROL.
@armymommy, @oregonmama, @ash1la and who ever else commented... thank you for your input... I'm completely shocked at the comments I got. I honestly see no difference if he is a boy or girl. Nor do I think it matters if he is mad at me. I know that if my teen was having sex and I wasn't told I'd be mad. But the only reason ppl but was she could get pregnant. If he has sex without a condom he could get an STD and die, so sorry I'd rather "tattle tale" then risk losing my brother.
@gunners_mommy....you are right their is so much that goes into this situation besides the obvious...what if she gets pregnant! STD's are no joke..their is so much responsibility that goes into having sex that teenagers just don't realize until its to late. So yeah I would sing like a bird to my parents!
@sara102011 so when you have a question you post on here you do whatever they post? Which is a million different thing as you can see. We all do what we feel is best, sometimes its just nice to know how others feel. @Oregonmama, @ash1la oh my this topic has turned ugly.
@Gunners_mommy if i were you and I walked in on them i would talk to her parents and yours! People who say the teenagers there gonna do it anyways yea they are but its better to make sure if they are gonna be sexually active to use protection and her be on birth control! It's better to be safe then sorry there are to many teens having kids at a young age! I rather him and her be mad then the parents be mad at you for catching them and not saying something if she got pregnant or if the both got an std cause there gonna be like well she knew and didn't do anything bout it!
wow. im sure all of yall would want to know when ur babies are 16 having sex.. but to each their own.
u tried talking to him and he didnt want to listen. ur doing the right thing. its not like ur doing it to get back at him, ur doing it to save him from the chances of ruining his life..
@gunners_mommy no need for this to turn ugly...everybody has their own opinions and its up to you to decide what your going to do....you know what's best for your brother.
Good on you, I agree you should talk to your parents, I'm only 17 and I'm pregnant, my boyfriend is 19 and we started having sex when I was just 14... if someone had of talked to us about protection, his parents or mine, I would not be pregant.. we never used any form of birth control and see what happened! Lucky for us we believe we can stay together and plan to get married, we love each other and have supportive parents who we can talk to openly. But noone ever told us to be careful even though his parents knew we were having sex... he needs a good sit down, preferably with his gf there, and I think your parents are probably more equipped to do it so I agree. It's not your child so you shouldn't be held responsible
I'm not saying that but you got all defensive about what we said. So it seemed like you only appreciated what the people on your side were saying and put down what the nay sayers were saying.
Comments
At 31 I am not even trying to raise my 16 year old step son's baby! And unfortunately it is so common on my husbands side of the family that no one even blinked when my husband had his son at 18....the cycle needs to be broken. Yes teenagers are having sex but that doesn't mean it is right or that they are ready for the consequences. Hell I know alot of adults that aren't ready.
It does.seem like.nonchalant answers "aw don't tell on him".......what?
@valentinasmommy, 16 sure as heck ain't & I don't care what the age of consent is!
@valentinasmommy, Exactly & that age will be once you're outta my doggone house! Lol
@amyduh first off just because its my parents house doesn't mean I can't open doors... he is 16 which is still a "teen" and I'm not sure if you have heard but teen pregnancy is out of control. But Its not all about pregnancy would u not worry about him getting an STd.
So when you say I shouldn't do what I did, I completely disagree. I tried talking to him about and was ignored.
Second just because everyone on here is pregnant doesn't mean its okay for a child to get pregnant. FYI I USED CONDOMS AND WAS ON BIRTH CONTROL.
@armymommy, @oregonmama, @ash1la and who ever else commented... thank you for your input... I'm completely shocked at the comments I got. I honestly see no difference if he is a boy or girl. Nor do I think it matters if he is mad at me. I know that if my teen was having sex and I wasn't told I'd be mad. But the only reason ppl but was she could get pregnant. If he has sex without a condom he could get an STD and die, so sorry I'd rather "tattle tale" then risk losing my brother.
@Oregonmama, @ash1la oh my this topic has turned ugly.
u tried talking to him and he didnt want to listen. ur doing the right thing. its not like ur doing it to get back at him, ur doing it to save him from the chances of ruining his life..