Alright ladies, baby daddy bullcrap! need opinions!

Fwee

Alright ladies back when I was 4 months along my baby daddy cheated on me once with this stupid girl. She ended up getting pregnant but heres the thing, she was sleeping with about 5 guys at the time. He ended up telling me about how he cheated and that hes sorry and that he wont do it again if I even want to stay with him and he understands if not. Well I decided to give him another chance and weve been through hell and back. But heres the thing, the stupid girl had her baby and well it wasnt her boyfriends like she thought it was! So now shes telling my boyfriend that its his baby! He hasnt taken a test yet but after all hes put me through he says that he wants to take care of the child if it is his. This thought kills me. Its like he loves the action that he did to completely ruin our relationship and betray me. He doesnt understand why I want him to sign the rights away to this kid and says that I do not understand his reasons. What he doesn't get is that bitch is gonna make his life hell for the rest of his life just because she has his kid and she can. He disagrees and says that its not gonna be like that. What are your guys opinions?

This girl says she doesnt want him in her life but for child support but I really dont trust her. Am I in the wrong for begging him to sign away his rights to that kid so we can continue with working on being a family without baby mama drama? Or is it horrible that Im asking for him to do that? He can hardly afford my son or living....

OutNumberedByBoys

Honestly, if it were his baby and he wanted to be in the baby's life, I think that is great. It is not the baby's fault and so I don't think the baby should be deprieved of it's father. I understand your reasoning for how you feel though. Hope it get sorted out for you guys.

DavidnAadynsMama

IF its his child, he has a right and responsibility to love and take care of it. He may resent you if you make him do this

DavidnAadynsMama

I know its gotta be hard, but you cant make him give up a child. Imagine if you cheated & got pregnant & he asked you to give it up. Just sayin

DavidnAadynsMama

I would def insist on a paternity test though since she was already wrong once

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ashley_smashley

Honestly you dont have any right to insist on him giving up his rights to this child, if its his. Its his blood, and no matter how it came into this world he/she will need him. And if he wants to do the right thing then that makes him better than a lot of men I know! Think about how you would feel as a child if you found out that your dad turned his back on your for the woman he was with. I can tell you, fron experience, it will hurt...my dad did that.

ashley_smashley

@armahnismommy AGREED!

Mimii36

You are wrong! Dead wrong! IM NOT TRYING TO BE MEAN SO DONT TAKE IT THAT WAY...BUT YOU ASKED OPINIONS AND ILL GIVE YOU MINE. He should not have cheated on you but you CHOSE to forgive him. That means you live with that decision. You have NO right to tell him not take care of HIS child(if its his of course). You don't punish this child by making him sign his rights over. Its not the child's fault. You are being completely selfish!

Mommyo4

Imagine the sitiuation reversed...what if he had chose her and she told him to give up rights to your child? Would you ever want someone to do that to your baby? The children are the innocents in this...they didnt have any choices. Let them both have a chance at a good life. But I agree...have him get a paternity test.

dra765

These ladies r right. Yea it sucks, but he's trying to be a man n that's good. If its not his great move on let it go. If it is have pitty for the baby n let him have his daddy. Maybe you'll love it too

mumma_to_be

He shouldn't have cheated. But yuur in the wrong too for wanting him to have nothing to do with HIS child! How would yuu like it if someone made yuu sign away yuur rights to yuur child!!? Yuu chose to stay with him after he cheated!

tinka1326

I totally see where your coming from. But now it's done it cant be taken back and signing his rights away is not the right thing to do. He started this by cheating, the price he is paying is raising a child he never intended to make. I feel your either going to have to learn to embrace this child or lose your man anyway. If he does give up the child, he will resent you ending up forcing you apart, or he doesnt you resent him for the baby, forcing you apart.
Try to learn to love the child simply as a child that has come into your life as an innocent, not a product of him being unfaithful

[Deleted User]

Tell him to get a dna test first...there's no need for u to be worked up right now bc u don't even know if the child is his. If the child turns out to be his then u probably should leave him bc it seems like u can't deal with the fact that he may have another child...I would rather have a man that takes care of his responsibilities than to have one that doesn't.

CristinaLynn

Ooh wow...even if the child isn't his, that is wrong. If my husband ever said some shit like that to me, there would be divorce papers thrown in his face. I'd never wanna be with a person who thinks like that...that shows complete and utter selfishness. Wow...that poor baby!

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mumma_to_be

@CristinaLynn He wants to be apart of the babys life but she wants him to sign away his rights to the baby and have nothing to do with it.

CristinaLynn

Nooo...I meant HER being selfish! Why would you want to take a babys Daddy away? That's so damn sad. :-( Sorry for the confusion...I should've been more detailed lol

starrxoxo9

Think how you would feel if you knew you had another child and someone forced you to ignore them. You'd end up hating that person. Tread carefully, because you're gonna end up being the one that ruins your relationship.

newmommyFeb2012

Don't forgive a cheater if you can't handle the consequences! Just because he stopped and says he won't do it again doesn't mean you get to just wipe away the past when a child is involved. Its very selfish to treat a kid this way. Him taking care of the baby has nothing to do with the woman or you, its what is right! That baby is innocent and deserves its daddy as much as your baby. Get a paturnity test and find out the truth.

Hot2Cold87

If u knew this baby was possibly his and yet you still forgave him why then turn around and ask him to give up his rights??? Sorry that's selfish that innocent child should go w/o a father b/c his daddy made a mistake??? A mistake that you chose to look over and accept! If it was going to be a problem then maybe you shouldn't have jumped back into relationship until after a DNA test was completed! I understand you are hurt who wouldn't be but it's just not the baby's fault and if you don't want to be step mommy then don't but ask yourself this what type a man turns their back on his flesh and blood for a relationship that's not guaranteed to work?? When y'all are over that child is still going to be there! And karma is a b**** if he do that he might be signing yours over next...

Hot2Cold87

Sorry for the rant but I just hope you search your heart and think about that child ...and anyway u said 5 guys it might not be his baby and you might just be changing his views of you...

jamieeex

You are THE most selfish human being I've heard in a long time.

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jamieeex

There's no sugar coating that, unfortunately.

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chelles

That's very selfish to ask him to sign over his rights because you want a perfect family. The baby is innocent and should be given every right to have a relationship with his father, do you know what the absence of a father does to a child?. Think wise and hard

second_time_mommy7

Personally I would NEVER be with a man that doesn't take care of his child. He is trying to do right and you are trying to make him a deadbeat. What if you hadn't taken him back, he went to be with the other girl and she was trying to prevent him from being a father to your child? It is not that childs fault. He did the right thing by admitting it to you and now he is trying to own up to his mistake and make it right. This is going to sound really mean but I hope you can think logically about this and let him do the right thing or I hope that he can stand up to you and not let you control this baby's life through jealousy. If you couldn't handle all of the things that came with his mistake you should have never taken him back. I know that this must be a hard thing to go through but you have to put your feelings aside and do what is right for the babies after all we adults make our choices babies just have what is given to them.

My2Boys

I completely understand how you feel (never been in the position, but it would suck). I think it would come to my mind to have him sign away rights, but it is not the right thing to do. Every woman wants a family and to be with the BD and have it all work out, but life is not a fairy tale, and you chose to forgive him and that includes everything with it. You need to try and look at the positives in it, your little one will have a brother/sister close in age. If you cannot trust BD and fully forgive him then you need to break up with him. It is not the childs fault, and as hard as it may be, you should be welcoming the baby into your family. Not saying that the relationship will not work out, but he has already cheated, and you said it has been hell, 50% of marriages end in divorce. IF your relationship with BD does not last forever and he loses a child because of it he will always regret it, and you will feel guilty for it in the long run. I would not have him sign away rights, it is the wrong thing to do, I would however not let him alone with her. Why dont you go with him to visit baby and make nice with babys mom since she will always be around. I suggest you deal with all of the actions and forgive him and TRUST him and move on, or leave now. The longer you wait around knowing that you will never be able to trust him again or love this new baby of his the worse it will be for everyone. Plus if the baby is his, think of how your child is going to feel when they get older and find out (because eventually they will somehow) that they have a sibling out there that they never met bc you did not let them into the family, and better yet you would not let them have a father, you have to be an example of what you want your kids to look back on.

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ripKaydence

@tootie08 i completely agree get the test fIRST ¡