The police had the whole county looking for him. They said if they didn't catch him tonight then he would be arrested tomorrow. Well he just came home on his own. The police are on their way now to give him a good talk. He laughed a thinks it's funny that they couldn't find him. I can press charges if I want for unruly juvenile. Gutta go, they're here.
Omg, he's having an attitude with the co & he arressted him! i'l talk more later, but he didn't arrest him for real he's just scaring him. I'll get back on here later.
@mama_kat I'm not sure, but the intervention program lady is coming wednesday so I'll find out more later. The cop still has him out in the car talking to him. I hope it's working...the cop is a staff sgt in the army & my son's dream is to join the marines. On a good note, we're having a positive talk with the 15 year old.
You are a great mom!!! I bow to you ^:)^ It's so hard to do something like that to your children.. But moms always know best and you're doing the right thing! I hope this whips him in shape and opens up his eyes to reality... I'd take him to a morgue and let him see how he can end up... We did that to my cousin .. Scared him straight
Thanks for all the love & support. They were out there talking a long time. When they came in he was having a better attitude & the cop said he wouldn't be giving me any more trouble. Well as soon as the cop left, my son said he's getting emancipated when he's 17 (that's in 3 months) & that he's leaving. His attitude was back. & he also said the cop told him my punishment was rediculous. Idk if that's true, but the cop must have told him about being emancipated because he never mentioned it before.
Now my strength is fading & I'm questioning myself. Was the punishment too harsh? I told him he was grounded from leaving home, computer, driving & I wanted his cell phone. Omg, he's going to hate me forever!! I love him so much, this is killing me.
You're doing the right thing momma! There is no way he could make it without you...teens think its sooo cool to be.out on their own, making their own rules...until they realize they are nowhere near ready for the full responsibility...he is still a child, and all you can do is do everything you know in your heart is the best to protect him from himself. Stay strong, he needs you more now then ever!
Shut both of their phones off, put a password on the computer, take the games systems and lock them in your room. Your punishment was lenient from half of what I would have done. You have got to be strong!! A judge will not grant him crap because he can't stay out of trouble and can't support himself. Keep going girl! You can do this!!! Take everything away...I'm telling you!
I did shut off the 15yo's phone & the officer gave me the 16yo's phone & I got a password on the computer. I will try to stay strong...sometimes it's harder than other times.
I know its hard but you are doing the right thing. Grounded for having illegal (+illegal for him) drugs? Uhhh I don't think so! Kid should consider himself lucky. I know lots of us would say we would whoop his ass, but its not pur child saying they hate us. So much harder I'm sure. Stay strong.
I agree with @kristaf22 maybe actually talking to someone from the corps and hearing that if he does certain things it will hurt his chances may knock some sense into him.
I've been reading your story and i give you major props you are doing a great job. Hopefully they will change, i want to know what's on the camera! It can give out alot of clues!
I think you are putting up with to much. My mom didnt take crap form me or my brothers. If we were out of line we were put right back in our place. My mom kicked my ass out at 16 for being my evil 16 year old self. I only lasted 2 weeks by myself then. She kicked my youngest brother out when he was 14 he was back and on his knees with flowers apologizing and begging to come home 5 hours later. I am sorry your boys are being such a$$ holes. Also my mom kicked us out for doing way less then what your boys are doing to you.
I don't have any advice on this I'm just hoping someone smacks the crap out of your boys to set them straight. No mother deserves what you are going threw with them.
You can not give in to him. At this point he will do or say anything to make you feel like you are in the wrong and give him back his privileges and let him continue to do what he wants. If I was in your shoes, the next time he says your punishment is to harsh I would look straight at him and say. "Your not only doing drugs, you brought them into MY house. You are lucky I found them and it wasn't one of your young siblings, because if it was them that found them you would know what HARSH is." To be completely honest I think you are handling yourself and the situation very well. I would be in jail for beating the shi* out of him. There is an old saying that goes "if your kids don't hate not at some point in their life, you didn't do something right." I think this situation is pure example of that. You have to stay strong and trust that as a parent you are doing what is best for everyone involved. And every time his words cut you and you start to question yourself you need to stop and remember, he had drugs in your house that if any other child had got a hold of everyone's life could have changed forever. Don't let up. He wants to be tough make an example out of him. I would also find some time to look into amacipation (sp) and print off some info for him to read with all of his free time. There are Alot of things that go with it, show him how easy it WON'T be. And then I would tell him to let me know when he is ready to go job hunting. Stay strong mama and know that you are doing the right thing, not only for him but for everyone involved. Prayers.
His just trying to get to you. This his proves you're doing the right thing. Don't over think what he says his the kid he doesn't tell you you tell him..it's weird around, here if any kid talked to cop like that they would be gone in second. Well just see what happens tom and keep going one day at a time and remember you have to do what is right for the whole family and we all think you're doing an amazing job.
I would try to find the root of this problem. Yes, all teenagers get wild at some point, and experiment, but if it's bordering substance abuse, there's gotta be a reason behind it. Something they went through as young children or something that affected them. Kids aren't born bad. I went through the same stuff as your teens, went to juvenile detention twice, was on house arrest, probation etc. After all that I made the decision to get my shit together but at 27 years old I'm still trying to figure out my past and why I did certain things. The best thing my mother could have done was be 100% honest about my childhood and not afraid to admit that something bad happened. Well I know she's still holding back and its holding me back. But I could have started to fix it a long time ago instead of going down the wrong path. You dont need to post all of your business on here, and don't worry about what everyone else thinks. I think a one on one heart to heart with both of them is a better solution than acting like a drill sergeant. They won't respond to that. Don't mention taking things away or punishment. You gotta get to the root of the problem. I know many people won't agree with me and yes I only have a 1 yr old but I just think our kids deserve more than just an "I'm the parent and what I say goes" attitude. They are humans too. Right now is when your teenagers need your unconditional love and support the most. Good luck and I hope they can find peace within themselves. %%-
You are an amazing mother! Just be careful with any juvenile charges as the military does have access to them and it will prevent him from joining. My father was a recruiter for twelve years
I completely understand what you are all saying. There are so many variables & things to consider.
It hurts so bad when your child, who was your little baby just a few short years ago, turns on you. It hurts to read his phone & see he is completely LYING to his friends about you & telling them things to make you look bad. When he says he hates you & wants to leave & never come back. It hurts when he kills you with his eyes while being led out your front door in handcuffs.
But at the same time you have to do what is best for them even when it hurts. I have tried talking to both of them & at times they're receptive & talk & at times they don't. I completely agree that they are human & deserve to be treated with respect....as a matter of fact I've leaned more in that direction his whole life rather than the "I'm the parent" & drill instructor type mentality.
Their dad left them when they were 1 & a newborn & they've had to deal with that along with me remarrying & having more kids. I'm sure it's not easy on them.
I'm sorry if I'm sharing too much of my life on here, but I have no real life friends & it helps me to be able to talk about it & get others opinions.
I just read all your comments and I wanted to tell you, you're a great mother. So many parents are too lazy to take action or too worried about being a friend to their children. One day they will thank you. It may be years down the road, but they will. Stay strong mama
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Well he just came home on his own. The police are on their way now to give him a good talk.
He laughed a thinks it's funny that they couldn't find him.
I can press charges if I want for unruly juvenile.
Gutta go, they're here.
i'l talk more later, but he didn't arrest him for real he's just scaring him. I'll get back on here later.
On a good note, we're having a positive talk with the 15 year old.
It's so hard to do something like that to your children.. But moms always know best and you're doing the right thing! I hope this whips him in shape and opens up his eyes to reality... I'd take him to a morgue and let him see how he can end up... We did that to my cousin .. Scared him straight
Now my strength is fading & I'm questioning myself. Was the punishment too harsh? I told him he was grounded from leaving home, computer, driving & I wanted his cell phone. Omg, he's going to hate me forever!! I love him so much, this is killing me.
He just knows how to push my buttons.
I don't have any advice on this I'm just hoping someone smacks the crap out of your boys to set them straight. No mother deserves what you are going threw with them.
It hurts so bad when your child, who was your little baby just a few short years ago, turns on you. It hurts to read his phone & see he is completely LYING to his friends about you & telling them things to make you look bad. When he says he hates you & wants to leave & never come back. It hurts when he kills you with his eyes while being led out your front door in handcuffs.
But at the same time you have to do what is best for them even when it hurts. I have tried talking to both of them & at times they're receptive & talk & at times they don't. I completely agree that they are human & deserve to be treated with respect....as a matter of fact I've leaned more in that direction his whole life rather than the "I'm the parent" & drill instructor type mentality.
Their dad left them when they were 1 & a newborn & they've had to deal with that along with me remarrying & having more kids. I'm sure it's not easy on them.
I'm sorry if I'm sharing too much of my life on here, but I have no real life friends & it helps me to be able to talk about it & get others opinions.