My heart is so broken. UPDATE 4*
My boyfriend and I been dating for almost 4 years. He was my first and I was his. We were so in love and dreamt of having a house together and a baby. He was my best friend and my boyfriend. We were the perfect couple that people dream about. Now that we have our baby and our house everything is took a turn downhill. He don't care about the baby. When he makes her bottles he NEVER checks the temperature and when i check he gets mad.. specially when i check AND i say its too hot. (which i ALWAYS check and its mostly ALWAYS too hot or scalding.) He don't feed her a bottle or table food.. he won't feed her unless he's eating and he makes sure HE has the last bite and won't get another one for her, He absolutely won't change her diaper, the only thing he did a few times was wash her face and hands, he never gave her a bath and when he "plays" with her he picks her up and makes he flip in the air and gives me a heartattack. He's never given her a bath or done anything a father would do. He don't even tell her he loves her. I always find dangerous sprays and things in her carseat and I yell at him to stop putting things in there but yesterday took the cake if i wouldn't of checked before I put her inside her carseat she would've been all blood. I found TWO BOX CUTTER RAZORS AND ONE BOX CUTTER on the seat of her car seat!!!!! And when i yelled at him he didn't care and said "I knew you would check so it don't matter." Then i said "What if I didn't check??!?" He said, "You would've." Then got mad at me!!!!!!!! I'm very religious and he always says spiteful things about that too. And were both the same religion. He don't care about me either, I found out he was texting some girl from work (that I'm friends with too.) And hiding it behind my back even though I told him its okay to talk to her, but I got mad that he was hiding it so i told him and he said he's "so sorry and he wouldn't do it again." Today i found out he's doing it again!! If i let him text her then WHY is he still hiding it unless something is going on?!?! She's married herself and has two kids but he tells me she's unhappy. I'm so hurt by him. He's completely changed he's ignoring me, calling me ugly, completely emotionally abusing me. I cry and he argues with me. I try and try to keep this relationship alive but he don't want it even when we talk I'm the only one talking he won't say a word and when he does its always an "i don't know." I love him with all my heart but i can't be with him anymore. I cook, I clean, I'm a great mom, I don't cheat. I'd do anything for him. I don't know what else he can want from a woman. I want to leave so bad but I have no money and no job and I have so much things I'd need to take with me like the tv and all the appliances and it won't all fit at my moms house. I'm just so confused but I know what's best for my daughter and I. That's to be away from him. Oh and he threatened me that he's going to take her away from me!!! When he don't even do anything for her! I'm so broken right now all I want is a happy family.
Comments
@Janet_2011 I try to ask him but he won't go. He's very stubborn and he don't think anything he's doing is wrong.
Oh and i definitely won't have anymore kids with him. Its hard enough dealing with one from him he's just horrible. She's not even the problem. He is. The problem is that he's her father and i have to deal with him.
@mommyof3girls i did leave for a week i actually just got back yesterday and all of the arguing started yesterday
He no longer talks to his mother because she allowed it. His mother is now begging for his forgiveness and begging for a relationship with us that I think she might never get back all because she was to scared to stand up to her shity husband. Act now before it's to late!
If my mom made it... you definitely can too.
So you can do it, its not impossible!
You sound like a great girl, and hes a total loser for not realizing what he has!!!!
You're job is to teach him without letting him know that's what you're doing. It's okay that the only time he feeds is when he eats... Now plan for it. Make his ways work for you. Force that feeding time onto him and allow them to bond and hell want to do more.
Regarding you moving... Start putting money away in a secret spot in the house. 30 to 40 every 2 to 4 weeks. See if someone you know will let you store your stuff in their garage. If all else fails... Leave that shit and get the hell out. Your not an emotional punching bag and TVs and appliances can be replaced.
@monkey_girl I'm so sorry for your husband. I need to put a stop to this before st happens to me.
@wilsomom thank you. Its going to be hard but it needs to be done.
@excitedforoctober I'm pretty sure that's what I'll do. My parents have a air garage but its filled already, they will make room but if all else fails ill get a storage.
@perly wow, your mom sounds amazing. I know i can do it i just don't know how to deal emotionally. There's a lot of ways i can make money here in vegas i just need the strength to let him go.
@starrxoxo9 oh okay. I think your right.
@captivated thank you! I need that.
@missamerika thank you for all the information. I will look into that.
@ynvtish see i would let him but he don't want too. It's as if he don't want to be a dad. I keep asking him to like change her clothes or diaper but he tells me no or takes forever to do it and he's sloppy about it. So i do it. i know he needs to learn but he's not willing.
We had fights!!! Tell him to check the temp of the bottle but also tell him he shouldn't feel the drop of milk on his wrist. If he does it is to hot/cold. Men get jealous if they feel like you are taking away from them, at least until the baby becomes more important than you.lol. I took my husband 3-4 months before he could honestly say our baby was the most important thing in the world. We both understand who comes first now and we are both fine with it.
His life has been turned upside down he may not know how to deal with it. At our worst point my hubby told to put lo our bsby up for adoption. At that point I told him to load my car up so I could leave him. I started gathering things n before one item nade it outside he changed his turn and started to try to make things bettet